I have always lamented that i need to change.
Be more disciplined(its 5am now!), be more focused, be more relaxed, be more on the ball, be more organised,…
more.
it seems like i always want more from myself. or is it? maybe i am asking myself to be less?
less ill disciplined, less distracted, less stressed, less disorganised…
I don’t know whats wrong actually. I’m never content with who I am, and everytime i change something, it never lasts.
After returning from Germany, i had this huge impulse to change for the better and now, its almost fizzled out. 
I want to. i so badly want to. But i’m getting in my own way!
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